Last tea session of 2009

high tea set at TCC..yum yum..super appetizing

End of 2009

i don't want to end 2009 with all these bickers, unhappiness etc...so i should end this year's blog with showers of blessing fr xmas just last week......food, laughter, presents, n baby lele who always never fails to brighten up our life

n talking abt tis unhappiness, it's nt entirely my fault in d 1st place..im nt d one who ignite d fire..it's juz start to blown up smhow..im being defensive..dat's a natural reaction...i sounds hurting, u do too...so full stop for now >>>>>

and to d end of 2009 at wrk, end of relax mood, coz my wrk is beginning to pile up...oops...off to fin my statistics for d mth....go go go

Xmas Gathering/Feast/Gift Exchange n Superstar Baby Mikaela :)

Desserts at 2AM Bar on Xmas Eve

Desserts fr 2am bar...this is not all dat we ate...d rest of d pix seems to dark to be seen..quality desserts with unique & exotic taste displayed like pieces of art...worth going again despite d hefty prices.

I just want to forget everything!!!

im tired of all this..im sick of all this....juz forget everything...i dun even know wat went wrong...i thot everything was back to normal aft dat previous argument in nov..so now it's back again..i thot we were enjoying chipmunks..n then it went back to d cycles again........juz forget it for now..n i hope d cycle wont cm bk again

What do you want me to do???

i shouldnt be writing this at wrk..but i cant concentrate anymore tis few days-i dun even know what im doing...

do you actually know that we are hurting becoz u r hurting....u have been saying dat i take my family for granted, my priority is with friends-nt family...actually i dun understand wat makes u think so....

u thot dat we were close enuf to share problems n worries...am i ever d sort to share problems with ppl..im always d type dat prefer to keep everything to myself....i cant help it..but tis has been it since young...yes-it's true dat letting it out doesnt necessarily means making ppl ard u get involved in ur worries, instead it makes us understand n noe each other better, but u r not letting it all out-i still think dat u r not letting it out completely

you only know hw to say i value my frens more than family, everytime u say this-i would juz cry nonstop...please stop repeating tis ever n ever again...i take my family for granted....u reali think dat way....before dat-why don't u ask urself too--is ur priority reali on us all d time in ur whole life? who was d one who always stay out in d weekends,coming hm in d wee hours-or not even cming back at all- who was d one who values her friends so much & always going holidays with them so many times per year....and please before u start to misunderstood me again-im nt blaming anyone or complaining-i just want u to think if u are so right in saying dat i take my family for granted

but hvg losing papa, u hv learnt to treasure ur family more n not to take them for granted cos frankly speaking they wont be with u forever. do u think u r d only one who was so affected with papa leaving us...please y dun u think of me oso, n even mama- i was only 12 dat time- d impact was so negative on me dat i was under supervision wif counselors...i dun think any one of u know dat in fact...im different fr u coz u grow up wif both papa n mama....n since young-im used to coming back to a empty house-opening d doors myself & doing things on my own...n for u, u seldom even use ur house keys,coz u nvr ever cm back to a empty house...dat is d difference between both of us- hw we grow up, how we handle matters & hw we handle our troubles..so dun ever say dat family is nt impt to me juz becoz u dont see me showing any concern on d surface

i wrote dat i felt lucky dat my frends were by my side..n u saying dat u r more glad dat family is by ur side.....goodness me..i say dat im glad my friends r by my sides DO NOT MEAN THAT I DON CARE IF MY FAMILY IS BY MY SIDE...don't u think u have been super senstive this few months, and always misunderstanding wat i meant.. tis is d reasons why we had so many quarrels or aguments tis few months

so please,do not think that i don't care about my sis...don't u know y i beginning to think dat my sis dislike me-ur behaviour seems so,ur attitude to me seems so

supper @ haagen dasz

Outing with Mikaela again..yeah

another of our cousins' gathering n outing wif baby lele..we r goin to d buffet at grand corpthorne waterfront hotel..haha-which is so near our plc...we dun nd any transport juz our feet..lol...i find d food ok only-but they do hv a variety..bak kut teh, claypot rice, soft shell crabs, my fav sashimi,etc...

aft d buffet..we convince leng to bring lele wif us to GWC to do some xmas shopping..haha, all of us couldnt bear to let lele go home...lol

Thoughts

i haven been writing for ages...only d happy stuff n d eating stuff is posted..hehehee..

telling myself to be happy n postive as always...so ppl always has tis misconception dat i hv no worries..hee, rite, dat wats i want others to think so- no point mking d ppl ard u involved in my worries..many things have been happening....family stuff-i know im not doing a good job-but i aredi tried my best(im nt sure either-u cant expect me much fr me-coz im reali still wrkin on my patience...) wrk- sm ppl r realli givin me lessons of appearance and deceit,etc...at d same time,i hv aso learnt who r d ones i can trust.....actually, i reali shld hv learnt it by now..never ever be too trusting...friends-im lucky and glad dat they r by my side...

n reali, smtimes i think it's better to be kept in d dark, rather than the truth